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"Before
I attended the YMUW I struggled with setting my lifelong
goals, including what I wanted to do for a living and
what I wanted out of life. At the Weekend I learned that,
even though I'm not always sure where my path will lead,
I have to trust my intuition. Now, three years after my
Wee
kend I have a good career and I am content with my life,
relying on my intuition rather than questioning it."
- BM, YMUW graduate, Age 22
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"My
21 year-old son did the Weekend when he was 16 and it
changed his life. He now has and honors a family of his
own."
- LM, Parent of YMUW graduate
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"This
experience was unbelievable! This is the best way to get
in touch with yourself and become an honorable man."
- JoJo, Age 20
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Purpose
of the Weekend
Why Young Men Need an Initiation
Dates of the Weekends
Weekend Agenda
Benefits of the Weekend
Registration
Download
a Weekend Flyer
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Purpose
of the Weekend
To provide young men with a weekend filled with incredible
fun and challenges, while building a foundation for a confident
and successful adulthood, through learning the importance
of teamwork, developing a sense of accomplishment and acquiring
leadership skills.
In the best of circumstances, every adolescent male faces
a vast array of stressful changes: new relationships, greater
expectations from family and community, a rapidly changing
body, the need to communicate clearly and an uncertain future
simmering in a stew of testosterone. He faces the formidable
foes of alcohol, drugs, gang violence, anxiety and depression.
All
of these challenges often occur in the absence of
a full-time father or a father figure. Is it any wonder
that studies state many young men, regardless of socio-economic
background, feel sadness and even fear at the prospect
of becoming adults? Research shows that adolescence
is a critical stage for a young man's future success
and happiness. Unfortunately, most young men are not
being mentored and are being misguided by their friends
and the media.
The
Young Men’s Ultimate Weekend directly resolves
the root cause of these problems: the lack of initiation
and mentoring. We’ve helped over a thousand young
men become respectable and responsible for themselves
and for others.
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Why
Young Men Need an Initiation
For thousands of years, cultures gave young men the right
learning experiences to learn how to handle the wins and
losses of life and how to fulfill their potential. At a
formal initiation, they were guided by adult men of integrity
who showed them how to become confident and independent.
The women and children supported the men and eagerly anticipated
the completion of this milestone episode.
This
time-honored activity fulfills the most fundamental need
of a young man: to know his rightful place in the universe
and his community. Through this realization a young man
knows that he is a unique and special creation who is responsible
for the safety and wellbeing of his community.
Societal
reverence for this inherent role was a powerful source of
identity, self-respect and direction for young men. Without
the training and esteem of the community for acting in this
gallant, protective capacity, young men can become apathetic
and confused. It is the responsibility of the community
to give young men the opportunity to be at peace with themselves
and the world around them.
The
young men who attend our Weekend come from diverse socio-economic,
racial and cultural backgrounds. We do not inquire about
their sexual orientation. We are non-sectarian; we do not
espouse any institutional religion. More than 50% of the
youth attending the YMUW originate from divorced homes,
however, our program is intended for all young men, ages
13-20.
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Dates
of the Weekend
North Bay - June 17-20, 2010
South Bay - August 20-22, 2010
North Bay Weekend will take place at Glen Andrew
2999 Buzzard Lagoon Road, Watsonville, CA
South
Bay Weekend will take place at
Boy Scout Reservation Camp
250 Scout Ranch Road, Boulder Creek, CA
Download Directions (Coming Soon)
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Weekend
Agenda
The tone of the Young Men’s Ultimate Weekend is continuously
characterized by the mentors through leading by example.
Our mentors know that the young men will be watching them,
observing their every word and action. Therefore the mentors
model the RIGHT values and because young men crave the feeling
of acceptance by older males, they will emulate the mentors.
Friday night
The program begins on Friday night by establishing the standards
by which the young men will live together and cooperate
to achieve the goals of their initiation. They form teams
and select their team leaders. Everyone participates in
the fire lighting ceremony, sharing the experience of awe
and reverence for this great mystery of life. We all heartfully
ask for the courage to receive the information and insight
we'll need to complete the Weekend. We end the evening by
practicing the values of Gallantry and Humor with late night
competitions and fun.
Saturday night
All day, the young men practice the discipline of working
at peak performance levels for the development of self-confidence.
They are given opportunities to develop organizational and
listening skills by leading their team or leading events.
They are expected to fully participate in sports competitions,
open forum discussion groups, ropes course training, community
service, drum circles, and ceremonies that are designed
to enhance teamwork and personal growth.
On
Saturday night the young men are given the opportunity to
release their anger, sadness and other unresolved emotions
from childhood in a secure environment. Through this intense
physical process, their wounds of childhood scar over and
serve as lessons for future life mastery. This ceremony
releases them from their past burdens, allowing them to
live with more freedom and be safer to themselves and others.
This
is followed by a formal rites of passage ceremony employing
dozens of additional adult males who come from the surrounding
communities just for this portion of the Weekend. They confer
icons to the young men, welcoming them into adulthood without
fanfare.
Sunday night
Early Sunday morning the young men and the mentors, as equals,
enter the sweat lodge that the young men constructed on
Saturday. Everyone is free to pray in their own way for
the strength to become more respectful of ourselves so that
we can better serve our families and communities. After
the sweat lodge the young men and the mentors deepen their
bond as they share in the delight of consuming a hearty
breakfast after a long night and early morning of ceremony
and ritual!
At midmorning the young men organize their belongings and
clean up the site as a community service.
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This
is done with the context that they are responsible
for caretaking wherever they are residing, whether
it be at the Weekend property or in their own home.
By noon, the mentors challenge the young men in sports
contests, with the shared celebration of fun and competition
reaching a crescendo! Afterwards the young men enter
their final ceremonies preparing them for the sensitive
transition back into their everyday lives.
Parents arrive at the site 1 hour before graduation
to learn the RIGHT Way® technology to help them
guide their young men more effectively. The Weekend
concludes in a heartfelt ceremony reuniting the young
men and the parents with a heightened awareness of
the importance of family and a greater appreciation
and respect for each other. |
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Benefits
of the Weekend
Young Men
At the Weekend the young men have been given the tools to
discover who they are and to practice the discipline of
keeping their word and honoring their commitments. By the
end of the Weekend our graduates have learned:
- To increase respect for themselves, their family, friends,
teachers, and elders.
- That always giving their best plays an important role
in achieving success.
- How to safely convert frustration and anger into productive
energy.
- They do not need to live life alone by asking for help.
- That they are responsible for their present and future
happiness.
Parents
At the end of the Weekend the parents attend a one hour
workshop to receive instructions about how to assist their
sons after their initiation. By the end of the workshop
the parents have learned:
- How to use the RIGHT Way® method to create more love
and less stress in the home.
- What young men need from both parents, whether they are
married or divorced.
- A simple technique to support young men to be open &
honest.
Mentors
In his book, "Male Menopause", author Jed Diamond,
male expert and YMUW adviser, states, "one of the primary
community roles that elder males must engage if they are
to be successful, is to be mentors to young men. Without
elder males committed to the well-being of young males,
the society falls apart". Immediately after serving
at a YMUW, our mentors describe their experience that can
be summarized as a primal sense of excitement and accomplishment.
They feel fulfilled that they have performed their biological
obligation of passing their wisdom along to younger men.
Magically, after serving at a Weekend the mentors are more
calm and more confident about who they are. They are inspired
to go back to their families and communities to be the best
men that they can be. Perhaps the most profound benefit
is that the mentors are privileged to hear the young men
pray about how they want to make a difference in the world.The
mentors leave the Weekend trusting that the young men are
ready to be heroes and take good care of the world.
Communities
It takes an organization of men and women to initiate young
men. Families cannot initiate their own sons. What better
way for people of all ages to get into communal relationship
than for the benefit of their own children?
When a young man graduates from his initiation, the community
becomes stronger by giving a gift that fulfills his most
fundamental need: to know his rightful and honorable place
in his community. When a young man knows that he is a special
creation who is responsible for the safety and well-being
of the people, everyone benefits from his biological need
to take good care of things.
The most important benefit for the community after successfully
producing an initiation, is also its greatest challenge.
Only when our society consistently and proudly behaves in
a way that models the virtues it values the most, will neighborhoods
earn the respect of its young men. When adults lead children
in the right direction, the young men enthusiastically join
them, eager to prove they are worthy of contribution! Are
we ready to teach them how to be moral and mature?
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Registration
Young men are welcome to register any time before the weekend
or on the Thursday/Friday that the weekend begins. Whether
registered before the weekend or at the weekend, all young
men must arrive between 5:30 p.m. - 7 p.m. on the Thursday/Friday
their weekend begins. Tuition for the events are $200 for
the 4-day event and $150 for the 3-day event. If paid within
7 days of the event, tuition is $225/$175 and no personal
checks are accepted. Tuition must be paid in full prior
to participation. Cancellations within 7 days of an event
will not be refunded but can be credited for future events.
An additional $20 will be charged for returned checks.
Special arrangements for late arrivals will be considered
on a case-by-case basis with the parent or guardian before
the weekend.
To Register for either the North Bay (June 17-20, 2010)
or South Bay Weekend (August 20-22, 2010)
1. Complete the *Weekend
Registration Form and fax or mail back to the appropriate
office listed on the form (PDF file may be completed electronically
then printed out). Please note that signatures are required.
2. Click here, *Confirmation
Letter, for information about where to go and what to
bring to the North Bay Weekend (June 17-20, 2010).
3. If paying by check or money order, please mail it with
the registration form. If you fax the registration form,
you can mail the payment separately. Make checks or money
orders payable to "YMUW".
4. If paying online by credit or debit card (the best way!),
please choose the appropriate link below:
Pay
tuition for the North Bay Weekend
(June 17-20, 2010)
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Pay
tuition for the South Bay Weekend
(August 20-22, 2010)
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*Note:
Form is in PDF format which requires that Adobe's "Acrobat
Reader" be installed on your computer. A free copy
is available at www.adobe.com.
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Home
About Us The
Weekend Family Services Volunteer
Donate
North Bay -
info@ymuw.org, South Bay - southbay@ymuw.org
(800) 719-9302
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